As of late, I’ve been told dozens of times that I “still have time.” You still have time to get into your career. You still have time to have kids. You still have time to xyz. I get it, I get it. Stop the pressure, relax and keep pushing forward. But, with all this time I supposedly have, why is it that folks seem to want to rush things in my life?
When are you going to get married?
When are you going to have a child?
When are you going to date?
This past weekend I attended my 10 year high school reunion. It wasn’t what I expected at all. I had mixed emotions leading up to the event. Initially, I was excited. Then, I wanted to not go. Then I was back and forth with it.
Last weekend I went to the Univer-Soul Circus with my niece. She’s gone every year since my sister moved out of state. I haven’t been to this event since I was her age. It has been 20 years! Now while I don’t recall faces and acts I do remember certain parts of the show; motorcycled in the sphere, elephants, tigers and lots of clowns in a tiny car. Those things are memorable. I remembered my excitement and the looks on my faces as I saw them on hers. But this outing made me think about the changes that have come with age and adulting.
The toughest thing for me since being here has been the job hunt! I’ve never been one to give up easily nor have I been “unemployed” for longer than 3 months (a summer’s time). But coming here I felt like it was a fresh chapter and with my educational background and work ethic I’d get into one of my chosen career fields “in no time.” I mean heck I’d done it numerous times with ease in Los Angeles (a big city) and I had no problem in Fresno (where I got my adult start), so what would be the challenge here besides hella miles, wide open spaces and what I’d thought would be a small decrease in pay?
I originally wrote about trying to get work in the real world after college in 2013 and again in 2015. Well, here it is yet again in 2019. Since the last Life After College post I’ve gone back to school again and obtained my masters of arts degree in journalism. I felt that I needed to learn more and gain more hands on experience to keep my skills up-to-date as well as my resume and of course to gain internships and network. I was able to do all of those things in college, but after graduating it seemed to get more difficult. I continuously applied to job after job, internship after internship. I reached out to people who I felt could direct me and that I’d built report with. Nothing came through. Not a paid job in the field or a “connect” in the field. It was a hard disappointment.
I’ve been struggling with what I wanted to share next. I haven’t had any real inspiration as of late. It seemingly has been blocked. I don’t know by what, I’m assuming by self. I’ve been listening to those around me and I’ve even asked others what I should write next. With suggested topics, I found that, well everything offered sucked! I mean, that’s how I initially felt. Why did they suck? Because I had no connections to them. I haven’t experienced or fully experienced some of these things that others thought would be good to explore and discuss. I’m connected to the things that I write. I FEEL the things I write and to me it would be a disservice to my readers if I did simply typed out things that I thought people just wanted to read. I need to relate to it so others can relate to it. That’s how conversations go, right?
Until our next conversation dear friends,
– Viola Constance
I’m back! Again. After about one month of blog silence, I’m back. I didn’t have brain freeze, nor was it due to lack of content, but homeslessness. Yes, you read that right. I’ve been struggling with accepting it and sharing it with others other than those involved and my mother. It was tough, but now I’m ready and able to share.
In the last 3 months I’ve moved at total of four times. Yes, you read right, four. Not really by choice if you will, but more so for a purpose. In my hiatus, I stressed about not being employed for a spell, not being about to contribute to household bills let alone clear my credit cards and more. And in the same breath I began working on myself inside and out. I completed a gratitude challenge with 21ninety, I kicked out cash (my last at the time that was gifted to me for a new camera) that I really didn’t have for a 6-week gym challenge and membership. Aside from caring for myself, I would also be caring for my six-year-old niece part-time. It didn’t seem like a lot. The bigger picture was always in mind.